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The Twiglet Zone (Live from Skaro!)

by Twiglet

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I am a model. At the moment I am Marshal Ney from the Airfix Napoleonic Wars gift set..

We really do live in Skaro!

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Marrow of Doooom

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DD came home with this enormous mutant marrow. It's not that I don't like marrow, I do, but I'm the only one that does and it's humungus.

Me: Where did you get that from?

DD: Hot David gave it to me

Me: Where did he get it from?

DD: Someone gave it to him

Me: Who?

DD: A bloke with an allotment..

Just now we are inundated with vegetables from blokes with allotments. We have only just finished the runner bean mountain from Stan's allotment and don't even get me started on the quantity of ridge cucumbers I've felt forced to consume. I'm all for growing your own but really just now the growers can't give it away because there's so bloody much of it.

The Marrow of Dooom is residing on my roof terrace like a hideous voodoo charm. If anyone out there wants it, come and get it!

Viv says:


18th Aug 2009, 16:42

Twiglet says:

Does that smile signify your wish to own the marrow of Doooom Viv?

18th Aug 2009, 17:44

JokerXL says:

Would make a good weapon that would.
Self defence, of course.

18th Aug 2009, 20:12

Twiglet says:

May I leave it at the side of the road for you then Joker?

It does look like a Cave Man's club though doesn't it?

18th Aug 2009, 20:27

JokerXL says:

I'd get arrested for carrying that, or at least get some very strange looks.
How would you cook marrow? is it like a fat courgette?

18th Aug 2009, 20:31

Twiglet says:

You boil it for a bit, stuff it and finish it off in the oven.... Or you could just have it as a boiled veg. Or you could make marrow and ginger jam or you could just keep it on the roof terrace and hope it goes the same way as the pumpkin head lantern.

18th Aug 2009, 20:39

Twiglet says:

Unfortunately the marrow of doom went unclaimed so I kept it on the roof terrace in the hopes that it would dry out and become attractive like gourds do. It didn't. Instead, this afternoon it exploded showering me and the Beloved Spaceman with what can only be described as marrow mucus....

I'm really not having the best week ever. That was the last straw. If I had a cyanide capsule and a loaded gun I would re enact a famous moment from history.

1st Oct 2009, 18:27

Twiglet says:

It was very funny too. I cried that I want to go home (South London) because I'm sick of living in Loony Land where the vegetables are mutants and they try to kill me...

1st Oct 2009, 21:43