Urban Alchemy

by bronxelf

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These are random moments in the life of an indecent designer and the city she loves.

To read my grudging babblings about design, click the button.

And can we really measure
If we think we're any better
than that skyline that goes on and on
forever, on and on...."

- Less Than Jake: Is This Thing On?

Everybody in this world wants the same damned thing-
just not at the same time.

-Chris Orbach: Jane

I could be condemned to hell for every sin but littering."

- Soul Coughing: Idiot Kings

I am a female, carbon based lifeform.
I am a New York City Native.
I am a Design Professional.
I take photographs.
I also sculpt, paint, create mosaics, and play with weapons.

And sometimes, I even dance about Architecture.

What I see, is what you get.

Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike License

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Yo Laz! Chekkit.

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This is East Houston Street (and for the love of all that's holy people,
that's pronounced "House-ton" not like the city of Houston. Totally
different thing,)Note. Chinese restaurant supply place on left.Note again the PET SHOP that is occupying THE SAME BUILDING on the right-- it says "Happy Paws" in case you can't see it clearly).I swear, I couldnt make this shit up if I tried.APK has been trying to get me to get a good shot of this for a while. I
desaturated it so it would be more clear.
28th Apr 2005, 15:45   | tags:,

Lyzardly says:

My dad took my youngest brother, Quinn, out for Chinese food when the poor kid was about 5.

Conversation went as follows:
Quinn: Gee Dad, there sure are a lot of smells in this place.
Dad: What do you mean by smells?
Quinn: Well, you know, spices smells and stuff
Dad: Oh, well it does take a lot of spices to make dog taste like sweet and sour pork.
Quinn: Can I just have noodles?

(The kid was a vegetarian for a year after said incident.)

28th Apr 2005, 15:49

bronxelf says:

I got one for ya. My friend Lance... his whole family is vegetaraian. His children have never eaten meat. So this was when the kids were like 3 and 6 or so. Anyway. they live in rural Michigan, in some serious nowhere. So they're all out in the car and there's a sign advertising for ponies. So the younger kid, Gryffon says "Daddy! Daddy! Can we have a pony?! " And Lance (so. love. Lance) busts out with "We can't have a pony! We don't have a freezer!"

Took all of a minute before his older son , Corwin says 'Oh come ON, dad... You know we don't eat dead animals..."

*dies laughing*

28th Apr 2005, 15:52

Lyzardly says:

Okay, here's another...

My mom used to make "hobo stew" which meant it had all sorts of random meat and veggies in it. We told Quinn that it was made with real homeless people, which is why it was called "hobo stew."

Just then he found a boiled potato and squealed, "It's somebody's finger - and the skin is still on it! SICK! I'm not eating this."

And he left the table.

28th Apr 2005, 15:57

Absolutely priceless.

Having had a somewhat rural component to my upbringing, I ate bits of more than one animal that I knew by name. To this day I'm not sure how I justify it. But that probably means you shouldn't be on the same plane with me should it crash in the mountains....


28th Apr 2005, 16:02

bronxelf says:


Laz- I'll skip the obvious joke here.

28th Apr 2005, 16:03

Yeah, the true sport always throws back the small ones.


28th Apr 2005, 16:06

Lyzardly says:

I could go on for hours... about why my sister would think my oldest brother killed her parakeet to make a sandwich... why my teddy bear was beheaded for his part in the iguana's death... why introducing the golden retriever to the bunnies was a bad idea... why we cannot discuss the simpsons at the table... how my brother steven really died... why there are pictures of my goldfish on the stovetop and my brother being placed in the microwave in a recipe book...

28th Apr 2005, 16:09

A reasonably famous chef in Austin, TX, showed me this beautiful picture he took of one of his babies curled up and happily gurgling in the bottom of this giant wok.

He showed me a framed 8x10, I should say.


28th Apr 2005, 16:13

Lyzardly says:

Love it!

28th Apr 2005, 16:24

kostika says:

Ohthe things Imissed by only having one sibling and moving away as soon as I could.

28th Apr 2005, 16:34

bronxelf says:

Yeah.. I was gonna say...

Note to self: thank mom again for the only child thing.

28th Apr 2005, 16:34

Rich says:

blimey. Shame we can't see a copy of it, it sounds great (the wok-baby thing)

Also only child going on here, amazingly. You'd never be able to tell.

28th Apr 2005, 16:40

Lyzardly says:

Oh, I wouldn't trade any of them for the world.

We're a bizarre group.
Out of the eight kids we have
3 Mormons
1 lesbian
1 high school dropout
1 teenage pregnancy
1 extremely musically talented goth girl
1 who is too young to be anything for more than a week at a time.

Seriously, no way to have more fun than with my clan.

28th Apr 2005, 16:41

Need a bigger wok for making Happy Family dish.


28th Apr 2005, 17:14

Hmm. One of his recipes: here

I note he's cutting back on the amount of baby he normally includes in his meals....


28th Apr 2005, 17:20

Arkadeis says:

Good lord Lyzardly, you sound like my family. Except none of us are musicially talented.

28th Apr 2005, 18:23

Lyzardly says:

She's the only one, and when I say talented I mean, Craig jokingly challenged her to play the beginning of "Winter" (Tori Amos) on our water glasses at Zen Palate - and she would not leave until she succeeded, a mere five minutes later. (Although she did steal other glasses and use other objects within reach.)

28th Apr 2005, 18:29

Arkadeis says:

Sounds like talent to me. I can't make the water glasses make noise consistently (unless breaking them counts).

28th Apr 2005, 18:32

Lyzardly says:

I love those breaky noises!

(Name the movie and I'll buy you a drink!)

28th Apr 2005, 18:33

Arkadeis says:

I had to cheat. I have not seen that movie in ages. Maybe not since it was in theaters.

28th Apr 2005, 18:37

Lyzardly says:

In that case, you only get a drinnk with well liquor in it.

28th Apr 2005, 18:38

Tiny says:

Hey..I was down in Houston for lunch today. Not Chinese though! Thank goodness or I would've been looking at my lunch again following this discussion. :-)

29th Apr 2005, 00:19